I'm Glad My Mom Died

I read this entire book in a day. Jennette is an unbelievably good writer, and captures the main points of her life that have led her to where she is today very well. It is very sad, but an important read for those of us who grew up watching her on Nickelodeon. Child actors often suffer more than we know or think, as they have little to no control of their lives, and basically no one to trust if their parent(s) are not truly supporting them. This book takes you behind the scenes of Jennette's life from being forced into acting as a six year old, to growing up with an overbearing, abusive, manipulative mother, to beginning her healing journey only a few years ago. I will not give any spoilers at all, but will say that this extremely well written, captivating, depressing, funny (in rather twisted ways), and illuminating. I highly recommend this book - I know I will be reading it again!

Jennette McCurdy, child Star of Kids shows iCarly, and Sam and Cat is a gifted, storyteller. Now 31, Jennette hasn’t written another self-help workbook or how-to book. She reveals her domineering, maniacal mother and their dynamics with hilarity, pathos, and agony. “Naked” is the best way to describe how our author depicts her fascinating journey. She was not without a plethora of trauma: • Waking at 4am for her first day at age 6 as background on the show X-files • Growing up in a hoarder household • The impact of being a Mormon • Stardom • Emancipating herself from the bondage of an eating disorder instigated by mom • Her struggle to develop into a woman The reader is sucked into Jennette’s very entertaining, pungently real, and disturbing world. “How many times can you pratfall over a carpet or sell a line you don’t believe in before your soul dies?” Debra McCurdy was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer when Jennette was two. Jennette’s two purposes growing up were; 1) to be the closest person in the world to her mother and 2) keeping her mother alive. Every birthday Jennette wished her mother to live another year believing her mother’s life was in her little hands. Debra loved to recount her cancer story to the family. “She goes so far as to MC a weekly rewatch of a home video she made shortly after learning of her diagnosis. ‘All right, everyone, shhhh. Let’s be quiet. Let’s watch and be grateful for where Mommy is now’ “Mom says.” Jennette reveals the fragility of her Mom’s life became the center of hers. It was drilled into Jennette’s consciousness that her grandparents killed her mother’s dream of a life of fame and fortune as an actress. Therefore, mom was hell-bent on giving the life her parents wouldn’t let her have to “Net”, Jennette’s nickname. When she asked Jennette if she wanted to be “mommy’s little actress,” there was only one right answer. “Yes, mommy.” If you’re struggling with a love/hate relationship with mom, need validation on how heroic you are for your independence from mom, or just want to read a terrific memoir, this is a must-read.

My kids grew up watching the crazy antics of Samantha Puckett on “iCarly “and “Sam & Cat” – Nickelodeon shows that were popular in the 2010s when my children were the target market for such entertainment. Jeanette is a natural at embodying the eccentric Sam. It is a testament to her acting ability that no one knew that she was secretly enduring terrible pressure and pain in her personal life.

Although very successful in her career, Jeanette never wanted to be an actress, much less famous. It was the dream of her narcissistic, manipulative, and abusive mother. Jeanette, the devoted and loyal daughter, embraced these goals never wanting to disappoint or upset “Nonny Mommy.” This came at a high price.

Jeanette outlines growing up in a “hoarder house” with brothers, grandparents, and dysfunctional parents all living under one roof. Her life involved acting classes/auditions, religious guilt, being taught and constantly encouraged to engage in eating disorders while dealing with the pressure of financially supporting her family from a young age. Not her dream, but totally her responsibility. It is no wonder that there is fallout: addictions, unhealthy relationships, sexual hang-ups, misguided loyalty, stunted growth, anxiety, and secrets. With the recent release of the documentary, “All Quiet On Set,” this memoir adds to the uncomfortable and painful glimpse into the child star experience.

Jeanette is truly an exceptional writer – her words are raw, deeply honest, and laugh out loud funny, completely capturing the absurdity of the situations she finds herself in, whether by choice or circumstance. She lays it all out there as she struggles to break free from the abusive bonds. Ultimately, it is very satisfying to see her walk away from acting and walk toward personal growth and redemption.