Boundaries Updated and Expanded Edition: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life

Amazon.com Review

In order to call themselves good Christians, many people have drawn overly flexible boundaries (unwilling to say no, always accommodating others' needs) or overly rigid boundaries (to the point of being righteous and judgmental). Psychologists and inspirational speakers Cloud and Townsend show readers how to set reasonable boundaries in order to follow the true path of Christianity. This book has become immensely popular, most likely because it makes personal boundaries easier to define and is filled with spiritual purpose. Some cautions: the format can be overly self-helpish for such a complex discussion and the authors at one point imply that judicious spankings may be an acceptable form of setting boundaries with children. However, many Christians will probably find themselves grateful for this biblical context of boundaries. --Gail Hudson

Review

Of every book that I’ve read, Boundaries is the one I recommend most often. All of us can overcommit, become doormats, or find ourselves in codependent and dysfunctional relationships. Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend’s one-of-a-kind book helps guide the reader through a change in mindset that eventually leads to a change in actions. If you know you have some unhealthy patterns in friendships, at work, in your schedule, with technology or your family, this book will help you establish the boundaries you need to create the life you are supposed to live. -- Craig Groeschel, pastor of Life.Church and NEW YORK TIMES bestselling author

Now updated and expanded, this classic book is more timely and relevant than ever for today’s “always on, always there” culture. If technology and social media are intruding on your life and relationships, learn from the boundaries experts how to protect yourself and the people you love. This life-changing book is still the go-to guide for healthy relationships, personal growth, and true freedom in Christ. -- Andy Stanley, pastor, author, communicator, and Founder of North Point Ministries

Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend is truly an “in case of (relational) fire---remove hammer, break glass” kind of book. If you need the pain to stop and the healing to start, read this life-changing book and follow its instruction to freedom. -- Dr. James MacDonald, senior pastor of Harvest Bible Chapel and author of VERTICAL CHURCH and ACT LIKE MEN. JamesMacDonald.org

Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend continue to break the boundaries of incredible revelation in their new and revised edition of Boundaries. As the senior pastor of a large church, this message has not only changed my life, but the lives of my staff and congregation. If you want to learn how to have healthier relationships, you need to read this book! -- Robert Morris, Founding Senior Pastor, Gateway Church, Dallas/ Fort Worth, Texas; bestselling author of THE BLESSED LIFE , THE GOD I NEVER KNEW, TRULY FREE , and FREQUENCY

I’ve been recommending Boundaries to friends, team members and radio listeners for more than twenty years. In fact, hardly a day goes by when I don’t use something that I learned from this book. The principles are timeless, and the updates in this version make Boundaries even more relevant to readers and their relationships. -- Dave Ramsey, bestselling author and nationally syndicated radio show host

Review

'Boundaries define everything from football fields to nation-states, yet our culture has pretended it could violate boundaries in human relationships without serious consequences. Cloud and Townsend examine the damage caused by this flawed view and point the way back.' -- Cal Thomas, Author

'Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend have great insights and practical wisdom into the God-given gift of boundaries. As they discuss how to take responsibility for and ownership of our lives, they give hope that we cannot just survive -- but thrive!' -- Josh McDowell, Author

'This book is going to provide a doorway of understanding and freedom for those of us who have allowed ourselves to be buried in the inability to say no. Thank you once again, Henry and John, for helping us toward freedom.' -- Rich Buhler, Author

'In this insightful and extremely helpful book, you will learn about a simple concept that can change your life: healthy boundaries. It's the ability to mark off your life in such a way that you multiply your love for others and minimize the problems you face. And it's waiting for you when you open this book I highly recommend.' -- John Trent, PhD, President

'I've heard a myriad of sermons on Christian servanthood that never discussed the value of saying 'NO!' in order to confront in love or to provide space to recharge the batteries. 'Boundaries' is the 'Untold Story' -- the other side of love and servanthood that we need so desperately but that we hear so little about.' -- Howard G. Hendricks, Chairman

From the Publisher

Since its release in 1992, Boundaries--the definitive book on healthy human relations by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend--has consistently appeared on the best-seller lists. And now its counterpart, the Boundaries video curriculum, has undergone a literal transformation. With its brand new, group-interactive format and components, the Boundaries curriculum gives pastors, counselors, churches, and organizations an enormously effective tool to help people move from desperation to sound relationships and joyous, fruitful living. Everything about this revised Boundaries is new. NEW easy-to-use Leader's Guide that minimizes preparation time. NEW Participant's Guide based on the original Boundaries textbook and workbook. NEW proven, group-interactive format designed to enhance individual participation and group synergy. NEW 120-minute video containing a brief message from Drs. Cloud and Townsend to group leaders, discussion jump-starts by the authors, and vignettes dramatizing topics covered in the nine different sessions. Designed for groups large or small, the Boundaries kit also includes a copy of the best-selling, Gold-Medallion-Award-winning book, Boundaries. This dynamic curriculum will generate maximum interest among church and small-group leaders. The principles and applications covered will make a real difference in relationships of every kind, from marriage, to family, to church, to the workplace, and beyond.

The Boundaries video kit includes: 1 90-minute video (not sold separately) 1 Boundaries Leader's Guide (additional copies sold separately) 1 Boundaries Participant's Guide (additional copies sold separately) 1 copy Boundaries hardcover book (additional copies sold separately) 1 clamshell-style carrying case

From the Back Cover

Is your life out of control? Do people take advantage of you? Do you have trouble saying no? Are you disappointed with God because of unanswered prayers? Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries helps us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances. Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions. Emotional boundaries help us deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others. Spiritual boundaries help us distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator. Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend offer Biblically based answers to tough questions, showing us how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves.

About the Author

Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend (www.cloudtownsend.com) are popular speakers, psychologists, cohosts of the nationally broadcast New Life Live! radio program, and cofounders of Cloud-Townsend Resources. Both maintain practices in Southern California. They are bestselling coauthors of a number of books, including Boundaries in Marriage, Boundaries in Dating, Boundaries with Kids, The Mom Factor, and Safe People. Dr Cloud is the author of Changes That Heal and How to Get a Date Worth Keeping. Dr. Townsend is the author of Hiding from Love and Boundaries with Teens.