Enlightened Sex ManualPaperback

If you are becoming familiar with David Deida, then this book is one good place to start, especially if you are doing so as a couple. This book describes Deida's view of masculine/feminine polarity, sexual energy, sexual desire, and more. And Deida being Deida, it is about sex and spirituality and growth. The book gives the sense that we are being offered an ancient way or yoga or art. We get the sense that Deida has learned this tantric-esque wisdom from various teachers, and now he is transmitting his knowledge to us. Maybe that sounds strange, but I've come to trust his advice and insights. An audio CD-ROM is included, in which Deida describes a number of experiential exercises. A remarkable aspect about Deida is that some of what he says about women is counterintuitive to men, and some of what he says about men is counterintuitive to women. And you are likely to disagree with some of what he tells you about yourself and your sex. But when you test these things out with the opposite sex, you find out that he's spot on. He's on to things that most of us don't understand, I believe.

Before buying this specific product, take a look at Deida's website/portal. Get a sense of ALL his products and pick the one that makes the most sense. He offers a fair amount of audio material, and if you aren't an avid reader, these may be more helpful. He has recently released a DVD titled "Function, Flow and Glow: The Art of Sexual Yoga," in which he shares his views of therapy, art and spirituality. He claims that he's mostly about teaching the "art" of great sex and loving, though he delves into the other areas with considerable insight and wisdom. The DVD is entertaining and informative (and funny), but I think it is mostly targeted toward the Ken Wilber / integrative spirituality crowd. You might be a bit confused if you are not familiar with the "Integral" world, but I suspect you'll find something of value anyway. I should probably note that Deida doesn't pretend that what he offers is empirically validated science. If that is what you are looking for, you won't find it here.

Another good place to start (even if you are a woman, I believe) is "The Way Of The Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Woman, Work, and Sexual Desire." Many view this as Deida's master work, and I can see why. "Superior" in the title is misleading because it is easily construed as macho-arrogant. But I doubt you'll come away with this impression. I learned about this book a few months ago from a woman in San Diego who is also a psychotherapist friend, and she thought this was a really great book. I've been reading this book over and over since then, and I have to say I agree with her. I learned plenty.

Finally, a book that explains what it is men don't get and what to do about it.

It explains why women suddenly lose interest in sex when the guy is really going.

It's not new age-y, it's the most grounded and sensible manual I've ever read. Here's a paragraph p. 108:

"Growing up, I was raised to treat boys and girls, men and women, equally. To me, that meant treating them the same. I simply had no idea that in intimacy, sameness is not sexy. It was a while until I learned that magnetic sexual polarity is based on the attractive play between masculine and feminine forces, which are equal in power, but also very different. Sex is the play of their differences, their push and pull, their interpenetration, union, and pleasurable unity. But a mush soup of mushy neutered sameness is not the basis for sexual play."

Taught by a man and and gives essential information for men. It describes sex on a physical level (and how many men get stuck here), then how it gets more intimate on a feeling level (and how most women function here), and even more intense when a merging unity happens between partners. YES! A book that gets beyond the physical.

I bought this for three men in my life. So good!

"Quite simply, the best sex manual in print, for the enlightened, the unenlightened, and everybody in between." ~Ken Wilber

this is what sex is about... a deeper look at the subject.

don't let the title scare you (it sounds pretty fluffy and new agey) this book is grounded and solid.

this is not really a 'manual' as it's often just essays and thoughts on the subject. it's written in short bits. very effective. highly recommend it!

two other recommendations: especially for women: "slow sex" by Nicole Daedone (FREE videos on youtube as "one taste" and Orgasmic meditation)

for men: also Mantak Chia (multi-orgasmic man, mantak chia taoist secrets of love(for men) will teach you how to seperate orgasm from ejaculation so you can not ejaculate and lose energy as well as it helps with premature ejaculation)

enjoy!

As a woman in her late 20's whose been struggling sexual issues due to sexual trauma in my youth, I think this is a GREAT book... Though the title is a bit misleading because it fails to reveal the spiritual aspects of this book, which is exactly why I would advise anyone read it!

I was amazed, inside this book I found answers to bothersome sexual issues, fantasies and worries I'd been having and some I had been being tormented by. It explains some issues that I personally would never had believed were shared by anyone else.. This was a great read and certainly helped me sexually and spiritually.

DO THE BREATHING EXERCISES! THEY ARE AMAZING!!